The Heartland POD. I apparently yelled, I am not bringing my child into the world to this shit! They turned the radio off. After the surgery I woke up in post op, which was a fairly large room with probably 6 to 7 other patients in beds waiting to become conscious again. *He's great with women - You can't fail to notice he's great with women. Heres why and what my vision is for the future of the AASPT. !, 10. Ohhhh noooo! HEADLINE 1: Contamination in Springfield's groundwater, and Missouri knew for Decades - STLPR. I knew a guy who had surgery and afterwards wanted to go home. The Orange County Lingual Institute opened in 2012 following the success of its sister institute, the Beverly Hills Lingual Institute which opened in 1996 in Beverly . My uncle said someone started singing phantom of the opera. 11. Like a hundred years now., 7. About the Author:Mary Elizabeth Velarmino Franciscoearned her Bachelor of Science in Nursing Degree from the Ateneo de Zamboanga University, Philippines. - Dakipa. Yeah. Doctor with a twisted sense of humor. Meet the Doctors; Services; . Nurse: (After seeing hypertensive medication on his bed) Do you take any medication at all? A 20-year-old man and his girlfriend came in at 2AM freaking out because something had tore his throat open. He seemed fine. I know this is actually going to hurt, but Ill try not to think about it., 3. All from $5.53 New Books from $5.53 Used Books from $6.99 All Copies ( 3 ) Softcover ( 3 ) Choose Edition ( 1 ) Book Details Seller Sort Page 1 of 1 Books by Funny Medical Journal Starting at $5.53 !, 29. My ass itches and Im too high to scratch., 9. Wooden surgeons. So in the spirit of science I proposed a test with the anesthesiologist: when she started the medicine I would begin counting backward. I said, Glad Michael Jackson could join us and that was the last thing I remember. Oh no!, Me: Whats the maintenance for this? Nurse: But youre taking hypertensive meds. She answered: "No ma'am. The saxophone part came from the jazz wait music (featuring a saxophone) that you often get when you call any Kaiser line. D double elle Senior Member 10+ Year Member 15+ Year Member Joined Oct 12, 2000 Messages 416 Reaction score 2 Aug 2, 2006 #1 Members don't see this ad. I think I had too much peanut butter and I think I have an STD., 22. I had the mask on her face and I said, nice big breaths, as I pushed propofol. In a hurried manner, my patient said: Oh, Im just so constipated! My brother went under and on his way out he said, Holy fuck, you are beautiful and Im in love to the nurse anesthetist. When he came to he said, Sorry, I thought I was a shark.. #4. Kids say the darndest things! I creeped out a nurse by talking about my occupation, and then even more by commenting on her butt in a backhanded compliment. Rozzette Cabrera is a registered nurse pursuing her childhood dream of becoming a professional writer. I now say, slow deep breaths, instead. 26. With coffee running through her veins, she enthusiastically battles each day, one article at a time. Nurse anesthetist here. Wed love to hear from you! Telling people the doctor has never seen worse is a good way to glorify it for sure. Apparently she looked very concerned by this information and my mother had to explain that Ive been a licensed funeral director for many years and hospitals and other facilities often do not remove tubing. I had an alcoholic patient who kept asking for a six pack but the funny part is that she was so aggravated/annoyed with people coming in her room, she said verbatim "I wish I had Ebola so you people would leave me alone." (submitted by tjh28 RN, BSN- Stepdown) 2. CTRL + SPACE for auto-complete. Patient: Do you want one of my cookies, Dear? 21-10-2022 17. I see no problem with taking Xanax and Halcion even on daytime., Related article: 30 Funniest Things that Nurses Say or Write, 19. Patient when asked about her chief complaints: Well, my hair hurts., Related article: 25 Funniest Things Doctors Say or Write, 23. Franois-Marie Arouet was born in Paris, the youngest of the five children of Franois Arouet (1649-1722), a lawyer who was a minor treasury official, and his wife, Marie Marguerite Daumard (c. 1660-1701), whose family was on the lowest rank of the French nobility.Some speculation surrounds Voltaire's date of birth, because he claimed he was born on 20 February 1694 as the . I am scheduled to have an autopsy (biopsy) in the morning., 25. Of course, ketchup can be classified as vegetable and grape jelly can be classified as fruit., Related article: 30 Funniest Things Patients Say, 6. 14 Ridiculously Funny Things That Kids Actually Said at the Eye Doctor's Office "Are you allergic to anything?" "Poison." Overheard Optometry 5 years ago. Just a baby though, not an elephant., 15. ! as I give them anesthesia. Dr. Taraman, pictured with his apparent doppelgngers, Linguini from "Ratatouille" and Flint Lockwood from "Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs." Lets take your gall bladder out and see if that helps. She writes about astrology, games, love, relationships, and entertainment. He also once called in the police to report a murder in his room! My first surgery they were putting me to sleep and I heard a James Taylor song playing and I said, I hope this isnt the last thing I ever hear., 56. In high school I had a reconstructive surgery on my knee as I tore my ACL and meniscus in a sports injury. 34. I was recently taking care of a 17 year old kid and he looks at me and says, Dude, I am high as fuck. They almost never remember it afterward. Me coming to after getting wisdom teeth out: So how long until the anesthetic kicks in?. YOU GUYS ARE THE BEST DOCTORS IVE EVER SEEN. Let me show you how to get started: 2008-2022 Mike Reinold All Rights Reserved, Blood Flow Restriction Training: Everything You Need to Know, Subacromial Pain: Keys to the Evaluation and Treatment, Keys to Shoulder Instability Rehabilitation, Assessing and Treating a Loss of Knee Extension ROM. Nurse, Im going to have to sue the doctor for prescribing me an illegal dose of Tylenol., 27. 1. 16. Patient: Nope. My wife couldnt take me for my first colonoscopy due to work so my mother did, and apparently coming out of anesthesia, when they were removing my IV, I told the nurse, Oh, thats neat. 2. Who do people consider to be more reliable than plastic surgeons? I had to go under for ear surgery once. My Quotable Patients - the Funniest Things Patients Say by Leila Leila Buckridge, 2021, Independently Published edition, in English 3. This is true in the case of nurses as well as doctors. 30 Funniest Things that Nurses Say or Write, 9 Hilarious and Funny Stress Balls For Nurses, 38 Funny and Inspiring Nurse Retirement Quotes, 30 Funny & Inspirational Nursing Quotes From Pinterest, 14 Cute And Funny Notepads Every Nurse Must Have. 18. He goes to put the mask on my face and says, This is oxygen. I cough as the mask goes on. 40 cute things to say to your boyfriend every day best life. 14. My mistake. 37. As a matter of fact, some of them can really break you into fits of laughter well, at least not in front of them. My wife is an anesthesiologist and her best line from a patient is: This is better than meth.. *wink*, #10. He turned to the nurse and said: You may not realize this, but Im a ninja and we heal three times faster than normal people.. And it inspired me to write this guest post today. 6. When I was coming up from shoulder surgery on a pretty substantial dose of fentanyl, my wife told me that I looked at the head nurse and said, Your boobs are spectacular, I want to see them. I have no memory of it, but apparently the wife was mortified, and the nurse thought it was hysterical. 52. Conjunctivitis.com, that's a site for sore eyes. 10 Funniest Things Patients Have Said to Nurses & Doctors 1. Ah, I have had this for quite a while. It was the third time I had been put under in a year. Q: What's the funniest thing a patient has ever told you? The anesthesiologist that came in to check me over had bright blue teeth and lips. Made me blush I was so flattered, and made the rest of my day awkward with my coworkers teasing me about it. CNA: No, I don't eat too many sweets, sorry. 30. I was coming to just as my doctor was finishing my colonoscopy. Oh Im just so constipated! Some patients arent always annoying. Woke up after wisdom teeth surgery alone in a small recovery room. You dont look like you have Lyme disease., 23. We are not medical doctors who learned to adjust the spine as a specialty, but are doctors of chiropractic (D.C). During my wisdom teeth surgery they were playing music, and Billy Jean comes on. I love telling that story, that lady made all our days. 54 Utterly Ridiculous Things Patients Said to Their Eye Doctors | INVISIONMAG.COM New York, New York, USA #overheardoptometry #airpuff #optometryinnewyork A post shared by Overheard Optometry (@overheardoptometry) on May 20, 2020 at 10:23am PDT 1 | 54 Previous 11 Versatile Eye Business Logos That Attract Clients in Many Different Forms 1. From what I was told, the doctor had to excuse himself because he started laughing really hard. After a while, he started sobbing, saying Was that my liver? 33. She is always happy to share her passion for writing and blogging. Specialties: Orange County's premier language school. She spent a few years putting her profession into practice until she decided to take her chances with freelance writing over a year ago. 51. Its so painful, I wouldnt wish this much pain on Osama Bin Laden., 12. The Dr. was in the room maybe 3 minutes total from arrival to transfer to departure. Robin McLaurin Williams (July 21, 1951 - August 11, 2014) was an American actor and comedian. Apparently the death rate for an ACL repair is pretty low. 20 Funny Things Patients Have Ever Said To Nurses, can really break you into fits of laughter, 4 Kinds Of Doctors Nurses Love Working With, Therapeutic Communication Techniques Quiz. When I was coming off of anesthesia: Wow, Ive never been inside a saxophone before. Yes, You Read That Right. 49. Here are thirty of the funniest things patients usually say: 1. Feeling some pressure "back there," I reached down and patted the doctor on the head. There are 2 screening tests available to check for prostate cancer. When they reach the rank of General of the Army, they can say "f*ck it" and go back to being a private for the fun of it so they can unlock everything all over again this time with a way to let other players know how cool. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. Diet coke in the morning will help combat your heart burn/ indigestion., 5. 27. He also graduated from Temple University with a Doctor of physical therapy degree. He leaves them in stitches. Turns out it was the battery on the laptop that was going to die. Last year they were knocking me out for a colonoscopy. The patient left the hospital feeling much better except for her original complaints., 14. Maybe you should feed your child some carrot cake so he would eat vegetables., 18. My Quotable Patients - The Funniest Things Patients Say: A Journal to collect Quotes, Memories, and Stories of your Patients, Graduation Gift for Nurses, Doctors or Nurse Practitioner Funny Gift LOL Journals 520 Paperback 24 offers from $1.46 Product details Publisher : Independently published (October 18, 2019) Language : English Friends buy you lunch. Your gallbladder has nothing to do with digestion so it cant be causing your constipation!, 22. !, 14. While there's no conclusive evidence about these things, we do know that it can lead to endless hilarity. It releases oxytocin, which can trigger all sorts of bonding responses in the human body. Whoever you are sleepy man, I simultaneously thank you and hate you. #15. Get a copy now! I encourage everyone to comment on this post with their favorite patient-isms. 65 doctors, nurses and patients with a hilarious sense of humor Morgan Slimak 10.10.19 It's never fun going to the hospital. Count backwards from 100 to prove it." 2. I was the patient. May I have a glass of water? So much for putting it into laymans terms for the patient. Count backwards from 100 to prove it., 2. Can I pass gas out of my penis? Cleanliness is next to godliness. GIVING A 5 STAR REVIEW.. More importantly, Trevor just starts the discussion, please comment and share some of your Funny Things Our Patients Say too! February 5, 2015 at 1:33 pm. Darling you said you wouldnt do that anymore., 8. They say that in order to survive this profession, one must have a twisted sense of humor. Although, one good way to make it through the doom and gloom and still come out with your sanity intact is by using humor. Im told that when waking up from getting my wisdom teeth out, I rattled off a very long list of the girls in my high school I wanted to bang, one of which was the dentists daughter. 31. He was treating a woman, and he said, Im putting you to sleep now. She replied with the most horrified look on her face, Like a dog?!. 25. I help people feel better, move better, and perform better. After all, David D. Clarke, MD, president of the Psychophysiologic Disorders Association, says 30 to 40 percent of the people who visit the doctor do have symptoms caused by stress. 12. 36. What I meant was a hospital room. Nurses work with people every day, and it is normal that they would experience not only toxic shifts, but also funny patients. Many of my patients have personal beliefs and stories that go beyond the physical world we live in. Happened today. Nurse: I want to have a peek in your mouth, Sir. Patient: No, you cannot pee in my mouth!! Mmy liver! I wasnt using any illegal drugs. My father had thyroids and I think I do too.. 11. I could prescribe you some Valium instead. When I was in school I was getting ready to get a lady off to sleep and was going through my regular spiel. This should be a fun post! Just for them to be human and treat us the same. Do you know other funny things that patients write or say? These hilarious stories from Ask Reddit are going to have you chuckling at your phone. I didnt overdose. 20. CTRL + SPACE for auto-complete. When my husband was in the recovery room coming out of anesthesia, he looked me in the eyes and very seriously said, Drugs are a hell of a drug. I was trying not to laugh too hard but it was hilarious. My hands hurt when it rains., 20. double elle Aug 2, 2006 This forum made possible through the generous support of SDN members, donors, and sponsors. Surgeons they slice and dice people for a living. 50. Just He wasnt recovered enough to and the nurse wasnt gonna let him get up yet. When will I be seen?, 4. Wow. "I am on a boat in the middle of the river and cannot get there for several hours." Again, the physician was on call. I have been waiting here for a long time. Otherwise, she will be fat., 17. Watch until the end where I share a clinic favorite for "funny stories." And learn how I remember all the funny stories that we have with patients in our phy. My last words were, its ok, 5 second rule. 15. Anyone who has worked in an outpatient setting treating shoulders has no doubt heard this one. Me: Oh no, now I feel like a car!. The dr. was gone so fast after transfer that we heard him yell 'Good Luck!' from 20 feet down the hall. Call (302) 999-0633. They stood over me and were typing into the computer when one nurse said to the other in a sort of frantic whisper, Weve got to plug this thing in or this one is going to die! Naturally, semi conscious me thought that the thing was me and I started to incoherently yell for the nurses to unplug whatever they needed to in order to find an outlet to keep me alive. Im an anesthesiologist. Its from the devil., 16. 10 Things Eyecare Patients Say That Are Giant Red Flags . Shop now. Last week, he dropped dead from cancer." "That's terrible," says the other friend. Lying can also be dangerous, as it could cause potential medication overdoses or interactions. I look forward to reading all of them! I was recently being put under for a colonoscopy. I know. She is always happy to share her passion for writing and blogging. Do you hear it?. Im here for my scheduled seduction (sedation)., 30. Im not even gay!, 13. I thought itd be funny if I asked, Does anyone need anything while Im out? right before I went under. 28. Thats an easy fix, Sir. 11. "Oh yes, nurse, " she replied earnestly. I just wash my hair often when I have nosebleeds., 21. #3. A baby catcher could be referenced to a lot of different things in the healthcare industry, but the most common baby catcher reference is for Obstetrician. Another of my favorite patient quotes is the doctor said it was the worst (insert injury here) they have ever seen. Some patients like to glorify their injury, and wear it like a badge of honor. Here are eight common mistakes parents of preschoolers make and some smart fixes to help avoid or resolve problems. A 20-year-old man and his girlfriend came in at 2AM freaking out because "something had tore his throat open." He seemed fine. Dont check my temperature with that rectal thermometer! I passed out hearing the nurses laughing. Patient was heavily sedated in ICU, nurse gave an enema. If you find that he's making conversation by talking about cool places to go or fun things to do, he . The anesthesiologist espied me and came over quickly. 21K views, 3.5K likes, 96 loves, 35 comments, 28 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from Bollywood Bubble - Videos: Sonali Bendre talks about taking a Break. It was controlled landing., 26. They are "iron sharpening iron." 4. 21. Please bring me some eye drops!, 28. My Quotable Patients - The Funniest Things Patients Say: A Journal to collect Quotes, Memories, and Stories of your Patients, Graduation Gift for Nurses, Doctors or Nurse Practitioner Funny Gift Paperback - May 12, 2018 by LOL Journals (Author) 520 ratings See all formats and editions Paperback $7.95 21 Used from $1.46 2 New from $7.94 Ive taken a lot of those out, but Ive never had it done to me, and my patients are always dead.. If you're a nurse dealing with one patient after the next, you can usually find humor in some of the lighter scenarios. 13. Straying Too Much From Routines. I was getting my gallbladder removed and as they were wheeling me back, I started to cry and said, Im gonna wake up with my lips stitched to someones asshole.. Nurses: What maintenance? Try these funny comments with your friends. It's been ten minutes! 19. 14 reviews of The Children's Hospital At Montefiore "Since i've now had the opportunity to bring my son here both for an ER trip and an admission, i'll go ahead and write the review. Known for his improvisational skills and the wide variety of characters he created on the spur of the moment and portrayed on film, in dramas and comedies alike, he is regarded as one of the greatest comedians of all time.. Williams began performing stand-up comedy in San Francisco and Los Angeles . When he is feeling funny. It was just weed! Minutes later I awoke. (As in, the police actually came up to his room!) 507 South Maryland Ave, Wilmington, DE 19804. Let me give you a prescription of Ambien., 11. Thank you. Benadryl has too many side effects. 57. When she was in fellowship she had a patient say they saw dicks dripping off the ceiling. Early life. It doesnt matter what you eat as long as they have your once a day vitamin., 4. "I'm not dying, am I?" 3. -ER- If you have a kid, sooner or later you'll be in the ER. The doctor has to know he's doing the right thing . Eating before surgery falls into both the "annoying" and "dangerous" categories. This never gets old. 2010 The Thought & Expression Company, LLC. I was wondering how much it would hurt if I jumped from here., 17. That being said, so are all of the other pediatric ERs in the area, but at least this one is open 24 . 17. 25. He was craving Chinese food, so they headed to a buffet, filled up their plates, and sat down, and that's when he actually woke up. Listen. I dont feel so good. Ankle Mobility Drills to Improve Dorsiflexion, 5 Tips for Landing a Sports Medicine Job in Professional Sports, Why Im Running for President of the AASPT. 2. My husband kept telling the medical staff after his procedure that: Its okay, my wifes a doctor. Upon evaluation, I ask the patient So how did you break your ankle? I was quickly corrected not once, but twice by the patient. Baby Catcher. After asking the patient what exactly is wrong, he answered: I dont feel it but look, ITS RIGHT THERE! He was referring to his uvula. Maybe you should put him in speech intervention., 7. Ive had patients say, here we go!! Why do all the patients love the surgeon who is also a stand-up comic? Please bring me some eye drops!, #9. When I was giving birth I was pretty out of it. Very prim and proper lady under sedation. A: A patient asked me what my first name was, and I told him it was Mustafa. 1. Colonoscopy. MENU Home; Patient Info. Do you want your baby to die? 7. 6 weeks, 54 needles, 2 surgeries, 7 ultrasounds, 6 people in the room and still 'conception' was wham bam thank you ma'am. jasyon. 47. Got the anesthesiologist to laugh before I went under. 46. #14. Funny Gift Idea for Doctors, Nurses, Medical Assistant. During a wisdom tooth extraction, a patient said to his doctor: "Charlatan! Anesthesiologist: Yes you had surgery and are waking up from it. My friends thought it was hilarious. He is a board certified specialist in orthopedics and also a certified strength and conditioning specialist. When I was going under for a surgery, my anesthesiologist asked what I wanted to eat after this surgery and apparently I said A steak with peanut butter., He laughed and said, Where do you get THOSE steaks? Sherry Moore, Eau Claire, Wisconsin Being Diagnosed With HIV Saved My Life. There was a little hard pellet inside my mouth and I think maybe it was my ovary., 24. Working in professional sports is fun and rewarding. 2. Should we Still be Using Rehabilitation Protocols? You got those crackers that come in packs of six with the cheese?, We have the peanut butter ones, though.. And I like also that you said about the little things, you know, we went for a walk in the . As part of the admission process, it was neccessary to ask her if she understood why she had been admitted. Trevor Winnegge PT,DPT,MS,OCS,CSCS has been practicing PT for over 13 years. What is the shadiest thing you've said or done to a nurse or doctor? Plunger down 99, 98, 97 I remembered nothing more. For your own sake, you better not make them angry. I forgot the names of my medications, but I remember that my last Blood Pressure reading was 121/119 mmHg., 29. I think there is a pill for that., 9. She also appears to be depressed., 12. 58. She asked, Do you love me? My stepdad replied, You need to go on and get your little Yoda shoes. Im pretty sure Yoda doesnt even wear shoes. And the first part of that is that thinking about it, you know, we, in order to achieve it, we have to think about it set out those steps. Keep in mind I was high as fuck. But I really recommend you get your child vaccinated., 15. Somehow my brain smooshed those two together. Please give your (toddler) son a couple of Benadryls to calm him down before bringing him in my office again.. Instead of a patient saying rotator cuff, we hear rotor cup, rotatory cup, rotor cuff. I think Im passing gas out my penis. Their faith. Me and the other nurses laughed for about 5 minutes straight. The Way Chronic Eczema Affected My Work And Life As A Mother Is Why I Advocate For The Community Today, 15 True Scary Stories From People Who Worked With Dead Bodies, 21 Morgue Workers Share Their Worst Of Stories, 35 Men On The Most Mushy, Thoughtful, Romantic Thing A Woman Has Ever Done For Them, 20 People Post About Their First Time Watching Final Destination. 54 Utterly Ridiculous Things Patients Said to Their Eye Doctors . I didnt actually fall. Here is a list of some funny surgeon jokes for your amusement. The doctors of Reddit reveal the most annoying things patients can do. I had a patient coming out of anesthesia who opened his eyes as I was switching him from a mask to nasal cannula tell me: This hospital has the most beautiful women Ive ever seen.. Perfect For Christmas or Appreciation Gift. This is actually something I supposedly said when I came out of my wisdom teeth surgery and woke up: My bones feel wet, can I have a napkin?. 10. Even better, I threw in a funny pic of a dog that looks like it is laughing, what a week (photo credit)! I played hide and seek with my friend in the hospital. The number of people I've had to tell to not drink or to stop drinking their urine is surprising.". "Am I in hell?" I responded, "No you're not, you're just in recovery." "That sounds like something the devil would say. My dad works with that stuff, funniest thing hes heard is: Hey mister doctor? He had been trying to use a propane-powered weed burner in his yard (think flame thrower) and things got a little out of control. You should never give your child powdered milk. The anesthesiologist accidentally hit the door frame on the way out. Too much thinking for ones self seems inflammatory. He was able to change my mind. 10. I still quote that at him sometimes! 44. September 10, 2012 / 0 Comments / in Fun, Pop Culture / by Angela. 50. Here is a selection of our favorite puns about the optometrist, hopefully you'll see some puns you like. Without missing a beat, while looking terrified, pops reached down and counted 1.23.yep all still there.. 20. It always comes up and puts us therapists in an awkward position. Here are some tips to put yourself in a position to land one of these jobs. He currently practices at Sturdy Orthopedics and Sports Medicine Associates in Attleboro MA, where he treats many orthopedic and sports medicine patients. Then immediately started rapping mumbled lines. It's true and the enthusiasm is highly contagious, but freeride is not an invitation to throw caution to the wind! Do we correct them and say it is actually called the rotator cuff? She also said it wasnt particular unusual to get comments of that sort. 5. His shoes are charred and the bottoms of his pants are definitely burned away but his skin isn't so bad. Single-player mode lets you travel to the different theatres of war and drop right into historical battles. He is adjunct faculty at Northeastern University, teaching courses in orthopedics and differential diagnosis. She knows what youre talking about. Im a lawyer. I got my administration right now." She meant to say menstruation! Patients need doctors with courage that just look to do their best and to look out for their patients first. Step safely off the piste : Freeride aficionados will tell you there's no place in the world like Chamonix! On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it had completely disappeared., 13. I had surgery last week for the first time. Hospital humor is not just jokes and pranks, it can also be more of a permanent fixture. An investigation by the Midwest Newsroom and St. Louis Public Radio has found that the Missouri Department of Natural Resources and the company Litton Systems, a former defense contractor that had employed . A patient who was recovering from extraction of his wisdom tooth and still woozy from anesthesiaspitted out the bloody gauze that was in his mouth. "You're 22 - wash your dick.". January graduated with an English and Literature degree from Columbia University. Doctors And Nurses Tell About Funny Things Patients Have Said On Anesthesia ADVERTISEMENT We've all heard about how people apparently reveal their biggest secrets while intoxicated. Before you invest time figuring out how to switch doctors, it's important to analyze whether such a change is necessary. My mother felt free to share that with EVERYONE. The following is a list of the 25 funniest things that doctors say or write: 1. As one of the oldest ski resorts in the world, Chamonix is not only steeped in tradition but if offers the steeps that attract the world's most talented riders. I mean, and Ive taken some PRETTY CRAZY STUFF! My mom was like smdh. Can you think of other things that doctors say or write? "It's OK, Yehudi," I said. Before my emergency appendectomy and right as they wheeled me away, I grabbed my husband and said (very loudly): Dont forget to tell them our backup plan. Apparently I then followed that up by telling the (young) nurse she had a nice butt, but not as nice as my wifes. National Public Radio recently hosted a conversation about obesity, weight, and health with several medical professionals, where listeners were invited to share personal experiences of discussing obesity with doctors. During a wisdom tooth extraction, a patient said to his doctor: Charlatan! Right before she went out she said, Thanks, I just had them done. I looked at my preceptor, we looked at the circulator, and we all burst out laughing. I was told a joke about amnesia but I do not remember how it goes. "I didn't overdose. Patient: Well fine then, you can lick me, I'm sour! Enjoy this collection of some of the wittiest hospital signs (real and imagined) from across the web: #1 Danger! Give the baby a bath in water and bleach to ease the eczema., 8. Another student nurse told me about another patient who had hallucinations. After asking the patient what exactly is wrong, he answered: "I don't feel it but look, IT'S RIGHT THERE!" He was referring to his uvula. I always tactfully correct, but still laugh to myself when I hear it. "Well, I told him a. Founded in 2010, Thought Catalog is owned and operated by The Thought & Expression Company, Inc. For over a decade, we've been at the bleeding edge of media, pioneering an infrastructure for creatives to flourish both artistically and financially. Roy - AGEUcational - Caregiver Happiness Series, Episode 4 of 4 - Dreams Turn Into Reality ( 18:15 ): Yeah. I had to take my mom to the hospital and while I was speaking to the doctor about her medical history, my mom was ~real~ insistent about them knowing her tennis elbow. I thought it would be good to mix it up and have a fun article on here! The prostate-specific antigen test (PSA) and the digital rectal exam (DRE). "I am too drunk to come in and see this patient." At least the physician was honest, but he was on call. After logging in you can close it and return to this page. Click here to listen to . After getting my wisdom teeth removed I looked at my mother-in-law and said, How did you get on my rocket ship?, 40. Consistency is key for preschoolers, says . "Eating before surgery. The DRE test is the one where the doctor inserts a gloved, lubricated finger into your rectum to reach the prostate. You know she is going to die if you get the flu and you make her get sick. "I have been waiting here for a long time. He once was convinced that one of the night shift nurses was running a prostitution ring. Sorry, I cant get you a mouth guard for you to stop grinding your teeth at night when you sleep. He pulls the mask away and I said, I trusted you. Where did the British surgeon safeguard the organs from his donors? Funny Examples of Irony in Real Life Our Hardest Riddles Ever He Can Do It Himself It was my first night caring for an elderly patient. Doctors And Nurses Tell About Funny Things Patients Have Said On Anesthesia Doctors And Nurses Tell About Funny Things Patients Have Said On Anesthesia By Moran Sapir - 2022-09-21 Article was originally published on our site playjunkie.com We've all heard about how people apparently reveal their biggest secrets while intoxicated. Their life stories. Apparently, right after they gave me the drugs I started talking about how cute my boyfriends butt is. But why do I have to take my medication with Coca-cola instead of Pepsi?, Related article: 30 Funniest Things That Nurses Say or Write, 9. "I know this is actually going to hurt, but I'll try not to think about it." 2. Patient has a broken ankle fixed and was coming out of anesthesia when he was being wheeled out. "Just go back to sleep." Yehudi is the name of my dog. some people go through life with vomit on their lips. They were adjusting my legs and such so my ass would be in prime camera insertion positioning. 53. Patient asked to rate pain from 0-10: Well, my pain is 20., 19. 60. They are mine and I will choose where they are to be spent!. I think I have anemia. We run the risk of the patient thinking we are rude for correcting them. The doctor says "It's just a pigment of your imagination". 26. Just as they had me move my knees a bit higher up I said, Yup, just like prom night. "What was the doctor saying about my dimentions (dementia)?" 5. positive and sweet things to say to your mom mommy moment. I called out for my mom and dad and when they didnt immediately come to my side, I called out for Captain Kirk. With coffee running through her veins, she enthusiastically battles each day, one article at a time. The doctor had to do a complete reconstruction of my meniscus and cartilage. It was this statement that lead me to think of the funny things we, as physical therapists, hear on a day to day basis. because I quit taking my Peanut Butterball (Phenobarbital)., 11. 23. He graduated from Northeastern University with a Bachelors in PT and a Master of Science Degree. Things doctors say to their patients. I was about to be put under for a colonoscopy while the nurse was trying to position me in a way to make it easiest for them to work. When the cats away, the kitten will play. Write CSS OR LESS and hit save. Funny things patients say!!! Patient with seizures: I had to come to the E.R. 51. A baby catcher is a funny phrase when referencing someone who deals with the specialization and practice of caring for pregnant women. I sent the coast guard to get him. Her life has never been the same since then. Im told that when waking up from getting my wisdom teeth out, I rattled off a very long list of the girls in my high school I wanted to bang, one of which was the dentists daughter. I looked around, saw everyone giving shits about me, said, Fuck this (loudly and very clearly), and went right back to sleep. I asked him how Smurfette was last night. Had a patient wake up violently. 22. She found me hiding in the ICU. I blew out my knee. He kept them in Liverpool. Still makes me cringe. Oct 20, 1998. I dont want you to be too surprised by my tattoo. conservative looking Asian man with a Pinocchio tattoo around his penis, with his penis as the nose. My mom was mortified. Buy My Quotable Patients - The Funniest Things Patients Say: Doctors or Nurses Practitioner Funny Gift Blank Lined Journal - a Journal to collect Quotes, Memories, and Stories of your Patients by Ernest Creative Designs online at Alibris. So yeah. ?" Not only will it most likely cancel your surgery and screw up the schedule you risk vomiting into your lungs which can kill you."-propofolme. My patients are well-informed, and it's not uncommon for them to alert me to something I need to research or bone up on. He then promptly told me that was the name of his pet lizard! Patient: Did you just do surgery on my leg? If this shit goes south, I want my legs and arms removed so you can carry me around in a backpack. The student doctor accidentally wheeled me into the wall cause he was laughing so hard. It is taught specifically in chiropractic . Your human ideas are just what a ,good doctor would order, and just what a patient needs. 35. 3. #1 Pants On Fire Guy comes into the emergency department via Ambulance with burns on his lower extremities. As the scope was introduced, she exclaimed, Oooh! "Women do not have heart disease." 10. 32. 15 Still Into Her: Talks About Her A Lot. First, they said I didnt break my bone, I fractured it. Well then, I stand corrected. 30 Funniest Things Patients Have Said On Anesthesia Mindaugas Baliauskas BoredPanda staff YouTube has brought the world many gems, but none greater than the trend of filming people at their most vulnerable - under the influence of laughing gas - and sharing all the funny stories with the rest of the internet. Trevor shares a great, and fun, article on some of the funny things our patients and clients say! Just last week, I evaluated a patient with a fractured fibula. 'He's sucking the life out of you!'" Melissa B. says "My doctor tried to put me on antidepressants when I started crying after he told me during an appointment that I would likely never have kids I'm not sure why he considered crying to be an inappropriate or excessive reaction? What is the rudest thing a nurse has ever said to you? 42. As such I had a curiosity: I had heard that when they knock you out you are still awake for awhile, you just dont remember. These are just a few of the MANY funny things we hear on a daily basis from our patients. "Sorry, I can't get you a mouth guard for you to stop grinding your teeth at night when you sleep. That's what I need!" #13. 24. Patient: Yeah, captopril. When he grew sleepy, I wheeled his chair as close to the. Patient: Then why are you running into things? 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